Last year, I wrote this post about my odd christmas memories where I shared all the weird things people have said to me, strange gifts I’ve received, and other strange things that I’ve experienced around the holidays and while I’m not one to complain about gifts as I’m happy to receive anything at all, I must admit, I have received some horrible gifts over the years. It’s hard not to notice gifts like plastic sweat suits, books on dieting and basically anything from the drugstore…
The Worst Christmas Gifts I’ve Ever Received
- Plastic Sweat Suits – No judgment if you actually have the balls to wear one of these things, but lez-b-honest – nobody looks good in them no matter how the ads try to lie to you about it. They force you to sit in your own sweat, they smell horrible, they’re uncomfortable to wear, and if you gift this to someone, you’re basically telling them they’re fat or telling them they need to sweat more? I’m not sure, but it’s totally weird. My boyfriend thought it was HILARIOUS when my dad and step mom gifted one of these things to me. You see, my dad totally rocks these bad boys at the gym on the daily so he thought it was a good gift. Bless his heart, but seriously no.
- Diet Books – Who said it was okay for you to give me a diet book? This is just like that time I was avidly trying to lose weight and my step mom’s neighbor friend took it upon herself to say that her friend lost so much weight by walking. You don’t say. It just amazes me the stupid shit people will say to your face. Anyway, yeah, don’t gift someone a diet book unless it’s on their damn list because that’s a total dick thing to do.
- Drugstore Fragrances – If I sound like a snob, I’m sorry, but drugstore fragrances are the worst. The quality is horrible, the scents are not good, and even the bottle designs look tacky. You can purchase cheaper perfumes online and the quality is WAY better and the packaging much prettier so it’s not a matter of price, it’s just laziness and a lack of planning.
- Travel Destination Shirts – This is hilarious because my dad would always travel to different states and countries and bring these back. I just think it’s a total riot he’s continued to gift me strange over-sized souvenir t-shirts into my 20’s.
- Water Bottles – Don’t get me wrong; I love a good sustainable water bottle, but if the same person gets you a random plastic water bottle every year, it’s bound to get a little weird.
- Sketcher Shape-Ups – You know, there’s nothing quite like getting a fitness fad item for the holidays and these shoes totally sucked. I think they got sued for false advertising for saying these shoes made people lose weight (which is ridiculous), but it was still pretty priceless to get a pair of these for Christmas and watch my step mom go on and on about how effective they were.
- “As Seen on TV” Stuff – This goes back to purchasing gifts at your local pharmacy which I’m pretty against as it is, but the gifts that really take the cake are the “as seen on TV” ones. You know, eggtastic, chillow, and Miss Belt, the waist trimmer.
Strange Things that Happened to Me During the Holiday Season
- My dad and step mom invited a bunch of strangers to dinner.
- My aunt told my boyfriend “good luck with that” when he mentioned he’s a type 1 diabetic.
- My step brother got angry at me for telling him my mom would definitely let him take leftovers home – why this something to be angry about is beyond me, but whatever…
- That time my dad gave my boyfriend a used remote control helicopter as a gift. I think he felt bad because he didn’t buy him a gift, but giving him a used helicopter was one of the weirdest/most hilarious things ever.
^ someone should gift this to me – just saying!