Why the Hell Aren’t You Following Me?

Last Modified: April 27, 2017 at 9:00 am by Tianna | Leave a comment

why the hell aren't you following me? Reasons why I dropped out of the proverbial rat race that is blogging.

[ Yes, I chose this photo of an owl because he looks angry and because, Hedwig. ]

Okay, so that’s probably a really overly dramatic title, but you realize I act in short films, right? I was just born this way. This post isn’t about to get all cray about my lack of e-fame or why you’re not following me, but I wanted to discuss my realization about something amidst the crazy mania that is blogging. What is the realization, you ask? Well, read on ๐Ÿ˜‰

Why the Hell Aren’t You Following Me?


For many bloggers, the idea of thousands or even millions of followers is akin to a wet dream.

Throngs of people commenting on your every social footprint, telling you how beautiful you are, and purchasing everything you tell them to. Even to some of us who don’t necessarily buy into the hype, it can feel contagious. We’re all tripping over each other in efforts to gain your trust, get you to sign up for our newsletters, and tell us exactly how amazing you think we are. At the same time, is it all worth it? As a consumer and person who watches YouTube, follows blogs, and fully interacts digitally, I cringe every time I hear a self-proclaimed YouTube “guru” tell me remember to “like, comment, subscribe, and give me a thumbs up!” and although I don’t mind sponsored content, I will immediately unfollow if the post sounds insincere or perfunctory.ย It wasn’t until I became aware of how I interact with others as a potential “reader” that I began to drop off the rat race that is blogging on the internet.

Blogging can be a total blast or a complete nightmare.ย Most of us started out for the simple joy of talking about whatever we like and interacting with others online through the channels of common interest. That said, between working with brands and trying to connect authentically with readers, there are times when it’s absolutely overwhelming. So, I can understand why other bloggers sell out. Why their content is stale and uninspired. Why they might be on autopilot every time they remind you to love everything they put onto the internet, but sadly end up sounding like a cog in the digital marketing machine.


And that’s when I realized, the price is too high for me.

I’m just not willing to sell out to that extent for a drove of followers who may have no idea what’s going on behind the scenes. I’d rather be a smaller blogger and enjoy genuine human connection with a select number of readers who actually feel engaged by my content and in touch with my sense of humor and self. I don’t expect everyone to like me or what I write, but I hope to find my own tribe of sorts. A group of readers and other bloggers who actually want to talk to me about the things I write about because, trust me, if I’m writing about it, I actually care about it. Otherwise, you couldn’t pay me to do it. I’m just not that easily bought and sold. #SorrynotSorry I won’t do it.ย Maybe this is why organic content and honesty are so important to me when blogging. I can’t stand a sell-out. Not eye cream nor money can fully compensate for the lies I’d have to tell to pull it off. It just isn’t worth it to me.

I came to the realization that being a unique, sincere, and caring human being, even online, is what I want to do.

Gaining followers, sponsored opportunities, or even the chance at “internet fame” isn’t worth being a fraud for, in my opinion. And while, yes, I do giveaways, use affiliate links, receive some products for free, and do sponsored content on occasion, I promise it will never be to my or your detriment. I would never agree to some shady marketing campaign or sponsored opportunity if I thought it was selling you guys (or myself) out to the highest bidder because, to quote Lil’ Wayne “that ain’t me.”

What Are Your Thoughts On Internet Bloggers/Vloggers and the Digital Marketing Craze?

Are You Following Me? Why or Why Not?


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38 thoughts on “Why the Hell Aren’t You Following Me?

  1. December 14, 2015 at 7:42 AM

    That’s why I love your blog and trust your opinion ๐Ÿ™‚ You are yourself, and you are honest. Nothing can beat that, you can consider me part of your tribe ๐Ÿ˜‰

    1. December 15, 2015 at 8:41 AM

      thanks so much Helene ๐Ÿ™‚ I feel exactly the same about you! I’m so happy to have you as part of my tribe ๐Ÿ™‚ I definitely am just myself and really that’s all I can be. I’m glad it shows! shipping your package today by the way! ๐Ÿ˜€ โ™ฅ โ™ฅ โ™ฅ

  2. December 14, 2015 at 9:44 AM

    This is definitely a thought process similar to mine. My blog and followers seemed to have hit a plateau and for a while that bothered me. But then I realized the people who follow me now are heavily engaged and enjoy what I write about. I post about a subject not everyone would care about but I love it and at least a small subset of people enjoy it. That’s enough for me. If I switched it up to whatever trend was going just to attract more views and followers I don’t think I’d enjoy it as much no matter what it brought me.

    1. December 15, 2015 at 8:42 AM

      Exactly! That’s definitely the point I was trying to make. It doesn’t matter if your following is small or big; it’s just about engagement and forging a real connection with people you identify with. I’m happy you’ve done that – you have a lovely blog ๐Ÿ™‚

  3. December 14, 2015 at 5:01 PM

    Very much agreed! My following isn’t huge, but I really like having the time to actually interact with everyone on my blog/social media and to get to know them. Like you, I appreciate the genuine human connection and I like being able to write about/share whatever the hell I want to. ๐Ÿ˜›
    Farrah recently posted…A Week of Catch-UpMy Profile

    1. December 15, 2015 at 8:43 AM

      yes exactly! I think a lot of people can be so insincere online and I just hope I can keep my space a genuine one. And yes, writing whatever the hell I wanna write about haha. love it โ™ฅ

  4. Kiki
    December 15, 2015 at 12:28 AM

    I completely agree with what you’ve said here. I’m new to following more beauty bloggers and I can tell when someone (say on YouTube) is trying to be honest but also not wanting to hurt the company’s feelings. It’s not honest and if I see too much of it, I unfollow. I think this is one of the reasons why there are so few bloggers I actually connect to. I’m going to start blogging and I really want to do it because I’m interested in seeing what I can create. And if people chance upon my blog, well by all means. I’ll share it with my friends and family on fb (I think. I’m very closed from most people I know irl), but overall it will just be for me. I feel like there’s so much I want to say and I need a place to say it. Doing beauty reviews and OOTDs is just a plus! p.s. I really enjoy how reading your blog is like hearing you talk. It flows effortlessly like a conversation. ๐Ÿ™‚

    1. December 15, 2015 at 8:52 AM

      Yeah I know what you mean. YouTubers are like the worst offenders when it comes to being insincere, in my opinion. Blogging is a really cool thing to do and it can be equal parts amazing and horrible lol. The important thing to remember, I think, is to make it into something you are proud to be a part of. forget the rest. it’s not important, you know? and yes, blogging is a good place to say what you want, how you want, and do whatever you want. I think some people forget that when they’re trying to please everyone or make it “popular” you know? I don’t want blogging to get to a point where it’s not fun anymore. that would kill it for me. Thanks so much for saying that! I’m glad you think so. I try to convey that on my blog as much as possible because this is really how I talk haha. And I don’t do youtube or anything so you guys can’t see how I am in person. I hope I can start doing videos or podcast of some kind in the new year, though. I want you guys to get to know me better! ๐Ÿ˜€ thanks for visiting and sharing your thoughts with me & everyone!

  5. December 15, 2015 at 10:59 AM

    Yes! I had fallen into the “want to be a big blogger” trap but I’m just starting to claw my way out of that desire.

    1. December 15, 2015 at 1:50 PM

      haha glad I’m not the only one. we will give each other a leg up out of that ugly hole. โ™ฅ

  6. Liz
    December 15, 2015 at 12:48 PM

    This is so well put, I loved reading this! You’re not alone feeling this way. The genuine connection with readers, and with the green community is much more fullfilling, in my opinion. I say it in a jokingly manner but I guess it can hold some truth: if I wanted to have a successful – according to the general standards – blog, I wouldn’t have started a green blog ;-D. My rule when it comes to blogging is first and foremost the following: don’t do something you’re not comfortable with, or not 100% sure of. It’s not worth it. Xxx

    1. Liz
      December 15, 2015 at 12:49 PM

      ps. I love that owl pic haha!!

      1. December 15, 2015 at 1:52 PM

        haha I loved it too! It made me laugh! glad you enjoyed ๐Ÿ™‚ thanks for sharing your thoughts Liz โ™ฅ

    2. December 15, 2015 at 1:52 PM

      thanks Liz! ๐Ÿ™‚ I totally agree. I’m so glad the green community is really small and more close than others. I totally agree with you and definitely think you’re right. it’s better to do what you believe in and write about things you love than just to do it for money, fame, etc. which you may or may not get anyway.

  7. December 15, 2015 at 3:46 PM

    I totally agree! I don’t care if any of my posts ever go viral, I love connecting with my readers, they are so much fun. I’m a new follower of yours now, your right that owl is angry looking. If I didn’t want to squeeze how feathery cheeks I’d be terrified. Nice to meet ya!
    Leslie recently posted…Wishlist 2015My Profile

    1. December 15, 2015 at 4:40 PM

      Hi Leslie! Thanks for following and sharing your thoughts with me /everyone ๐Ÿ™‚ I love connecting with people too and I think it brought joy back to my blog to realize that I don’t care about the e-fame, the money, etc. It’s nice to have, but it’s not the end all, be all. and yeah, I love the owl! haha. I wish I had a real one ๐Ÿ˜€ I would name him Hedwig โ™ฅ nice to meet you too Leslie โ™ฅ

  8. December 16, 2015 at 1:36 PM

    “I came to the realization that being a unique, sincere, and caring human being, even online, is what I want to do.” And it really shows! The whole blogging thing can become a real rat race. And I’m glad you’re one of the few bloggers who’s above it.

    1. December 17, 2015 at 8:08 AM

      thanks so much Kareen. I really appreciate that. I try to be above it, but it’s easy to get caught up in for sure. thanks for stopping by and sharing your take on this!

  9. December 17, 2015 at 6:00 AM

    That’s such a good attitude to have! I am still super small since I only started recently, but I hope to never be tempted to focus on numbers rather than actually expressing myself.

    1. December 17, 2015 at 8:38 AM

      thanks so much Heather ๐Ÿ™‚ it’s an easy trap to fall into, but I think as long as you stay true to your blog’s mission and continue to write about your passions, you will be okay ๐Ÿ™‚

  10. December 17, 2015 at 1:40 PM

    So true and takes courage to admit that ๐Ÿ™‚ I think along the similar lines because I create content that I want to because of love for blogging !


    1. December 17, 2015 at 4:54 PM

      exactly! And it’s a hard thing to give up the “race” for success, but then I think success is not a ladder. If I achieve it, it’ll be because people related to me and enjoyed my content, not because I sold out every which way. I feel relieved, though, knowing that I can focus on creating good content instead of fretting about the latest social media craze. thanks for stopping by!

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  12. Ann
    December 18, 2015 at 8:05 AM

    Another small time blogger saying hello! ๐Ÿ™‚ With a lot of followers, it is hard to catch up with the readingon their blogs too!

    1. December 18, 2015 at 8:55 AM

      hello Ann! that’s very true. I think a lot of the bigger bloggers think they’ve ascended interaction and reading other blogs. There are some that do it, but it seems kind of rare. In my opinion, there’s a certain level of narcissism in some of the big bloggers that really irks me. It’s less about connection and more about being “popular” online. Super weird lol. thanks for sharing your thoughts and so nice to meet you! โ™ฅ

  13. December 19, 2015 at 10:34 AM

    Love this! And: yes, yes, yes! ๐Ÿ™‚ Although compared to me you are one of the “bigger blogs”. ๐Ÿ˜‰

    1. December 22, 2015 at 9:31 AM

      haha thanks so much for commenting Stef! Glad you liked the post and it’s so strange/nice/funny to hear someone say I am one of the “bigger blogs”. I still feel like I started my blog last week in a weird way. thanks for visiting and sharing your thoughts xx

  14. Jed
    December 22, 2015 at 7:34 AM

    Thank you for this. I got into blogging for all of the right reasons, but there are still moments where I find myself writing for the wrong ones. Thank you for the reminder to keep writing for the joy of writing, and honor of sharing my story with the world–and not for the social-media applause.

    FYI here is a “like,” from me, not because you asked for it, or I feel obligated to give it, but because I sincerely appreciate what you wrote. Wishing you a happy Tuesday!
    Jed recently posted…Picking a Fight with an Unjust LawMy Profile

    1. December 22, 2015 at 9:50 AM

      Absolutely. I think it’s so easy to get caught up in making money or becoming popular online that you can forget what you started for. thanks so much for stopping by and reading my post! Thanks also for the “like” – always nice to have one of those ๐Ÿ˜› I’m glad you enjoyed my post and that is resonated with you in some way. Happy Tuesday to you and happy holidays! โ™ฅ

  15. December 23, 2015 at 2:26 PM

    This post made me laugh, but in a good way. I do agree with you. It’s hard trying to make your blog a business without selling out. Fortunately for me I haven’t gotten there, and maybe I won’t. I started my blog for me, not for sponsorship or whatever, frankly, I didn’t even know about it until a couple of years ago.

    Thanks for sharing this on my linky party!
    Have a wonderful Christmas and New Years!

    1. December 23, 2015 at 4:06 PM

      I’m glad the post made you laugh, Stephanie! I’m always trying to make people laugh, but my boyfriend never laughs at my jokes. I always complain that he doesn’t think I’m funny since he never laughs so at least people on my blog find me funny (I will use this as an argument against him later)! lol. I totally know what you mean about making your blog a business without selling out and I didn’t start blogging with an intention to make money either. I was actually pretty against it in the beginning, but when you find yourself putting so much time into something, it’s nice to see some return every now and again. I don’t think I’ll become one of those insanely big bloggers, but it’s nice to make extra cash on the side. And I totally didn’t know you could make money blogging until a few years ago either lol. I still feel like a total newbie in so many ways. Have a lovely Christmas and New Years as well! thanks for visiting ๐Ÿ™‚

  16. February 27, 2016 at 8:47 PM

    I found that while my numbers may be lower than some of the bigger bloggers my engagement is generally higher and so that’s OK with me!

    1. March 1, 2016 at 11:06 AM

      definitely! I think everyone has their strengths. I have lower pageviews, but I have a lot higher engagement and a decent following. Every blogger/niche will be different ๐Ÿ™‚

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